Diet Coke-Babies

This isn’t, apparently, a groundbreaking review of a new product.  From what I can see, this came out about last year or so.  But I’ve only recently begun seeing it near me, so for my purposes, it’s new.  And that’s what counts.

I’m not going to get into the mythical properties of the Ice Cream Man.  There’s too much to say on the topic, too much emotional gushing, and just too much nostalgia for me to properly do it justice in an introductory section.  But I will briefly touch on my Ice Cream Man.  My current, insane, Ice Cream Man.

You will know he is in the area when you start to hear Christmas music in the summer.  If you flag him down, you will see the wonderful assortment of products he has to offer – colorful product sheets stuck on the side of the truck.  He will, however, not actually have any of these things for sale.

If you ask for a Batman pop, he won’t have it.  If you ask him for a dozen other things shown on the truck, those won’t be available, either.  He will then say the five or so random bars he has on the truck – presumably, the things he found in his house’s freezer earlier that day.

A few years back, he randomly had one thing that looked good – a Watermelon Bomb Pop.

This intrigued me, since Bomb Pops are awesome, watermelon flavoring is awesome, and it looked like a pop-shaped version of a Wattamelon Roll.

I will not delve into the sadness of my Wattamelon Roll absence, as it has been covered before.  But still, I am sad.  All the time.

The Bomb Pop turned out to be awesome, and I looked forward to the Ice Cream Man coming back around, to purchase a bunch more.  However, he never had any more for sale.  Instead, I was probably offered a Target-brand Chocolate Eclair or peanut butter Frosty Paws.

I contacted Blue Bunny back in 2012, but was told that this product could only be purchased through vendors, and couldn’t be bought directly, and was not available in stores.

Then, a few weeks back, I saw the retail version in stores, and was joyous.

Bomb Pops now come in a few varieties, but those other varieties don’t matter because what’s important is that Watermelon is sold in stores.

One big difference between the Bomb Pop and the Wattamelon Roll is that the Bomb Pop is dairy free.  The pop isn’t sherbet, and the chips aren’t chocolate.  The chips are this weird, compressed blackness, made up basically of oil and sugar.  They don’t really taste like anything, but it’s okay.

The chips give some bite to the pop, and makes it look more like watermelon.  So I don’t particularly care what sort of witchcraft and chemicals went into making them.

I don’t want to insult either company with my comparisons.  As is well known, Wattamelon Rolls are literally the greatest creation in mankind’s history.  So the Bomb Pops have a lot to live up to.  I make the comparisons to show that the Bomb Pops prove to be a worthy substitute, since I can’t buy the Friendly’s goodness.

Or, to put it in a classier way – the Watermelon Bomb Pops are the methadone for my Wattamelon Roll withdrawals.  Just slightly less effective.

So go out and buy these – they’re awesome.

[insert seal of approval here]